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10 Tips for Living the Life of Your Dreams

Why Are You Here?

When I ask this question, I’m no longer inquiring why you are in the location you’re in, or why you are in the metropolis, you are in, or even why you are in something us you are in. I ask the query because I’m questioning why you exist in any respect?Web Job Posting


In the fall of 2003, I released a book I wrote known as The Why Are You Here Café. It is a fictional tale of a person who wanders into an all-night café and is surprised to find three questions about a menu. Why Are You Here? Do You Fear Death? Are You Fulfilled? I am not so boastful now to assume that I even have the solution to how everybody besides for me need to live their existence. I know, though, that there are sure things I’ve learned that help me reflect onconsideration on existence differently. I desire things that I had found out earlier in life, matters that I mirror regularly and that continually deliver me a lift and assist me on my journey to achieve the existence of my desires. My hope is that in sharing those things with you, they may in a few way help you for your journey to live the lifestyles of your dreams.

1. Know your Purpose For Existing (PFE), or at the least be searching

Your Purpose For Existing is precisely what it says. It is the cause you exist, the motive you are alive. It is the answer to the question I requested you at the start of this article. Why Are You Here?


Your PFE is like your personal non-public compass for existence. Should you go to New York City and emerge as a commodities trader? Go back to your PFE. Why are you here? Should you journey the world as a peace corp. Volunteer? Go returned in your PFE. Why are you here? Should you stay in dating, you have been wondering? Go lower back to your PFE. Why are you here? In addition to taking a notable deal of the strain out of choice-making, it additionally takes a number of the tension out of everyday lifestyles.

You don’t have to justify to yourself or absolutely everyone else why you do what you do. You realize the answer. You meet someone, and that they say, “Hi, what do you do?” You reply, “Oh, I teach yoga,” or “I’m an insurance shop clerk,” or “I’m a chiropractor.” “Interesting,” they are saying, “what made you cross into that line of work. “Well, it enables fulfill my Purpose For Existing,” you respond. Wow! That is a effective announcement. You do what you do as it enables you to fulfill the exact purpose you exist. It doesn’t get a whole lot easier or extra effective than that.

2. Fear is a horrible factor; do not allow it to manage your lifestyle.

Someone as soon as told me a high-quality quote about trying something new. He stated he were scuffling with with worry for a long time until sooner or later his buddy instructed him, “Listen, realistically what is the worst that would show up.” I assume this is notable remark to don’t forget. We are frequently paralyzed into non-movement through the concern that some thing drastic might happen. But the fact is that almost any decision we make or action we take can be modified if we don’t like the outcome. We can almost constantly move again to whatever it became we were doing earlier than we attempted something new.

Furthermore, what are the chances that the “worst thing” will happen? It likely isn’t in all likelihood in any respect, and but that remote hazard keeps us from doing the matters we want to do. My principal “Aha” moment, which enabled me to get beyond my fears, got here sooner or later when I unexpectedly found out that there are very few matters wthat have no longer been carried out with the aid of at the least one, and probably heaps of humans. Certainly, everything I become attempting, different humans had already attempted and succeeded at. Well, heck, I notion. If they might do it, so can I. It is possibly that something you are attempting to accomplish in existence, someone, sooner or later in records, at some spot inside the global, did it, and proved it is able to be carried out. If they may do it, so can you.

3. Either we can live as a speck of meaningless life, or we can live a lifestyle of that means

Have you ever been someplace on an immaculate night whilst you may get a wonderful observe the celebrities? You have been in an area high-quality and darkish with no local lights distracting your eyes. How many stars do you watched you can see together with your bare eye when you appeared across the entire sky? It appeared like hundreds of thousands, I bet. The sky seemed simply full of stars. Well, the reality is that the monstrous amount of stars you notice on a very clean night time when there is no outside light is sincerely about three,000.

To positioned that wide variety in attitude, remember tthatthere are one hundred billion stars. In our galaxy by myself Now, our superstar, that’s the sun, has nine planets and fifty four moons that rotate around it. Using our star as a proxy, that means there are 6.3 TRILLION stars, planets, and moons floating round in our galaxy. So what you notice on a superbly clean night, that enormous quantity of stars and area, is around .00000005% of the whole lot in our galaxy. Amazing, isn’t it. Now do not forget this. That is just our galaxy. Do you already know what number of galaxies there are? Scientists estimate there are over 500 million of them.

So with all that as perspective, how essential are our person lives in assessment to the complete universe? It is quite clean to look how someone should suppose that they’re just a speck of meaningless lifestyles. Certainly, we’re all just specks in the large photograph. But assume we are not meaningless. Suppose there may be a particular cause that every people is here, a cause that we exist right now that goes beyond just sperm met egg and 9 months later out popped a little you or me.

I agree with there is a motive. I agree with we each have a selected Purpose For Existing, or PFE, as I like to consult it. My tip is, locate that purpose. Fulfill that purpose. I’ve had humans say to me, “But what in case you are incorrect?” “What if I assume I have a PFE, and I live my existence like I do, however I genuinely am only a speck of meaningless existence?” My respond to this is always the equal. If we find what we think is our very cause for being alive, our purpose for current, and we stay a lifestyles to meet it, we will have given meaning to our lifestyles. with the aid of default, what has meaning can not be meaningless.

4. Realize something is enjoyable due to the fact we determine it is pleasant, no longer because someone else tells us it’s miles.

There are lots of people accessible seeking to get you to shop for things, and they’ll let you know almost something to get you to do it. Do you know how much cash turned into spent on advertising in the United States final 12 months? The answer is a dazzling 124 billion dollars. The intention of those prices is to get you and me to shop for matters, and advertisers are getting more and more savvy about a way to do it.

For example, they have found out that reminiscence and emotion are great elements in whether or not o consumer has logo loyalty to a product. So they overview brain responses of test subjects who are proven classified ads, to peer if a selected commercial invokes a reaction from the emotion center or reminiscence center of the take a look at issue’s mind. That way, they can inform if the advertisement will stimulate long-term emblem loyalty for a selected product. Can’t you see that? Someone is strolling down the street, they skip a billboard, and have this excellent, compelling, but unexplainable urge to buy lottery tickets.

Are we to that factor yet? No, I do not suppose so. Will we get to that point? I don’t know. The factor is, thatmarketers and advertising era are, and will continue to, make it harder and tougher to sift via all the noise stoform our personal attitude on things. The undertaking is to recognize something is pleasing now not due to the fact someone tells us it’s far, however because we individually decide it’s miles gratifying. Does love truely come within the form of diamond earrings, which say “You love her and could marry her all all over again”? Does self well worth and empowerment genuinely lie in proudly owning a specific automobile? I in my view do not think so in either case, however do not pay attention to me anymore than you will listen to the commercial. You decide.

5. Be grateful for and leverage the benefits that come from residing on this u. S.

We have a few top-notch opportunities at our fingertips truly because we live in this United States of America. Now, I don’t know about you, however all I did to get these possibilities turned into come out of the womb in what turned out to be a completely fortuitous spot. Do you know how a great deal the common college graduate in Myanmar (formerly Burma) makes? They make 10,000 Kat in keeping with the month. That is set $12.00 U.S. How approximately the average university graduate in China? How a whole lot do you watched them make in step with month? That range is 1500 Yuen, that’s just under $two hundred.00 U.S.

Now salaries of that value are enough for the ones humans to characterize their us of a’s respective economies. In all likelihood, though, the ones people will in no way be able to tour and notice the sector. They can’t afford it. But we can. We have the economic benefit of robust forex compared to the general public of the sector. In this United States of America, we are able to get an schooling, and we can go out and get a respectable paying task. We think unemployment is clearly getting awful while it hits 6%. In locations in South Africa, it is over 40%.

As a rustic, we’ve got our honest share of troubles. When you get out of doors to the borders and journey to other locations, you spot things that make the U.S. Look like paradise. We have freedom. We can say what we want, purchase what we want, emerge as what we need, journey wherein we need, and for the maximum element the handiest issue we did to get all this, is come out of the womb within the right geographical region. We should not take it for granted.

6. Look at the little photograph, however with a huge angle

People regularly say, examine the large picture. I say have a look at the little picture, however, with a big angle. Do you know what existence is? Life is truely a day elevated through approximately 27,500. Sometimes it’s far much less, hopefully, greater, but generally around 27,500. The easiest way to make certain we have a existence we revel in is to make certain that we do something we revel in every day. I’m sure this sounds simple to you. It took me many years to determine this out.

Doing something you revel in every day is an instance of searching for the little image. But hold in mind the large perspective, which is what your PFE is? What is it that you want out of existence? Why are you right here? Here is an instance of a little photograph and a big perspective. Do you do a little form of labor for a minimum of 20 minutes every weekday? Do you go to a process, work at home, something? How about this. Do you awaken each weekday and stretch for a minimum of 20 minutes?

Ok, one of a kind question. What is extra important to you, health or money? Would you permanently change the ability to stroll up a flight of stairs in change for cash? Would you permanently change the capacity to take a motorcycle experience along the beach, lawn, elevate up a grandchild, play sports, or cross fishing in trade for cash? Then be careful approximately how you spend it slow every day, due to the fact making the decision to move off to work 20 mins early, or spending a further 20 mins at work, in preference to taking 20 minutes in step with day to stretch, is a sluggish version of trading the one’s competencies.

We will be predisposed as a society to spend all forms of time on different matters. When we are precise and worn-out and slightly have the energy to say hiya, we interact with people who suggest the most to us or spend time on ourselves. This is the fast music to finding yourself feeling like a stranger with the folks that suggest the most to you and yourself.

7. Seek out close to existence stories

At the age of 28 I started to have close to existence stories. Have you heard the time period close to loss of life experience? That is while people live on a heart assault, or nearly get hit by using a car and they get this first-rate feel of lucidness about how short life is and the way they ought to deliver a few idea to how they really need to live it before they do not have a existence to stay. Well, at 28 I started to have the one’s revelations with out the capability for an experience to the emergency room. I commenced having close to life experiences.

Near lifestyles studies are the instances whilst you are doing exactly what you want. You are enjoying existence, you’re having the exact enjoy you need out of existence, and due to that you are feeling absolutely fulfilled with the life enjoy. Near life experiences (NLE’s) can come from something as simple as hugging your large other or as complex as achieving a tough aim you put for yourself. They come when you are enjoying your PFE. When you are having a close to existence revel in, you are certainly and delighted. It is the maximum excellent feeling in the world.

Find the ones moments for yourself and discern how to get more of them into your life each day. Experience so a lot of them which you get to the factor where you insist on having a life full of them, an existence where you fulfill your PFE. Have them as quickly as possible, because the first-rate issue approximately experiences, specially near lifestyles experiences, is that the earlier on your life you have them, the longer you have to achieve the benefits. What you learn at 20, 35, or 50 may be applied for a lot extra time and to lots greater situations than what you analyze at eighty-five. Even better, the reports construct upon each different. Once the insights start coming, they devise this extraordinary foundation of information upon which everything else rests.

8. Choose your own metric of achievement in lifestyles

When you have spent time in other international locations and then come back to the U.S., you realize how strongly our way of life equates success with money. How a good deal do you’re making? What type of automobile do you force? How big is your home? These are all cash-based totally metrics. If we select that as our metric, that’s first-rate, just so long as we make sure that we chose it. While we are deciding what our metric may be, we need to consider that cash is not the most effective one. The quantity of time we spend every day doing what we need, our degree of achievement with lifestyles, how happy we are, how an awful lot love is in our lives, and plenty of others are also metrics for success in life. Evaluate them closely because the metrics we choose turn out to be the riding pressure for our actions.

9. Act as your life relies upon your choices, as it does

Have you ever been in a discussion where you have been debating what to do, and someone said, “Well, what could you do if your existence depended on it?” It certainly puts things in a exclusive angle, doesn’t it? Now all of a unexpected, it’s far extra crucial. MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!!! Well, in reality, our existence relies upon the decisions we make every day. Whether or not we gain and enjoy what we need out of existence is entirely dependent on our daily decisions. Have you ever heard of the time period “The Big Five”? The huge five is something which you pay attention to all of the time when you are on safari in Africa. It stands for rhino, elephant, buffalo, leopard, and lion. People are constantly asking, “Have you seen the big five? How a number of the big 5 did you notice? Where had been the large five?”…

I suppose we have to undertake this time period for our lives. The Big Five for Life will be the five matters we, in reality, want to do, see, or enjoy in our existence. The things that on our deathbeds, we will appear back on and go, yeah, I did my Big Five for Life. Wouldn’t that be a high-quality communique starter? “Hi, I’m John, and you’re?…” “Nice to satisfy you. So, what’s to your Big Five for the Life list, and how can I assist you to satisfy them?”


Although they can be, objects at the Big Five for Life list don’t have to be matters which can be one time occasions. For instance, primary on my listing is to have a lifelong, loving relationship with my spouse. It is something with a non-described give-up date. As long as I am here, it’s miles on the list.

The cause I suppose this would be so outstanding is due to the fact we often overlook to act like our existence depends on our choices. We get right into a pattern, and we have most of these motives why we can not do the matters we want. Make your each day choices as if your lifestyle depends on it because it does.

10. Choose paintings on things you are obsessed with, and you will continually be passionate about what you are working on

Here is a statistic you may locate stunning. It was taken aback by me. In a median week, along with the two days of the weekend, someone will spend over fifty-two% of their wakeful existence at work, attending to paintings, or on work-related activities at home. Over half of our conscious life is spent on paintings. Now that is something to keep in thoughts while making selections about what form of work we want to do. “I am selecting to offer half of my existence to the pursuit of something this activity is.”

If you’ll spend 52% of your awake lifestyles on paintings related items each week, you might as nicely pick to work on something you’re enthusiastic about. I understand this may be hard. We stay in this exciting world where human beings value experience at some thing over an awful lot more important skills like flair, general intelligence, power, and lots more. Nonetheless, think of it this way. However, if there is something else you have continually desired to do, lack revels in, each day you don’t pass do it’s far a day much less of revel in you may have. You might as nicely get started right away.

John Strelecky is the worldwide pleasant selling writer of ‘The Why Are You Here Café.’ In its first 10 months, his e-book had offered in 14 countries and set the arena report for the fastest income on all seven continents. Through his e-book, articles, speeches, and appearances on tv and radio, he has undoubtedly impacted the lives of thousands and thousands of human beings.

Irving Frazier
Irving Frazier
Future teen idol. Devoted communicator. Typical student. General analyst. Alcohol expert.Earned praise for training inflatable dolls in Deltona, FL. Was quite successful at building Virgin Mary figurines in Fort Walton Beach, FL. Had moderate success testing the market for saliva in Washington, DC. Earned praised for my work testing the market for basketballs in Fort Lauderdale, FL. Earned praised for my work importing teddy bears in Gainesville, FL. Spent the better part of the 90's developing shaving cream in Jacksonville, FL.

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